A faith confession

10 04 2008

If I ever loose my faith

Faith I don’t know where to start, when it’s about faith. Since a faith for me has no beginning, and no end. God has given me a faith I cannot fully accomplish. Instead of reading only the Qoran, I read the Bible, too. And I still feel I am in a quest….

of meaning of life. Since I thought once I have faith, I can be the strong person that I wanna be. But faith is fading inside myself, because of life, even once I found in religion. So, wether I try to seek for happiness or meaning, there has never been a faith like religion.

But then when I loose my religion, the emptiness is just too cold and scary. I am afraid of the dark side inside myself, afraid of falling into the darkness of a human’s heart.

I’m seeking riches, materials… and hope to find a happiness inside tangible objects, hoping that I will have the best car, the best house, the best wife, the best education, the best service from other people. And then I feel that it’s so fake. When I see masks of these people around me…

And then I suddenly realize, materials can never give me satisfaction or happiness, it was faith that give me satisfaction and happiness. All these things have no meaning, if I don’t have a faith.

A faith to you, a faith to me, a faith to God.

A faith to keep me, in the sunshine.




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